51.煮熟的烏龜 Cooked Turtle
- COOKED TURTLE
Fresh water turtle was the favorite food of Zheng Laozhi, who lived in Ankang, Dantu, in Jiangsu province. He loved to eat fresh water turtle for three reasons. First, he said the flesh was just right, not too firm and not too soft. Second, he slept better after eating turtle. Third, he thought turtle meat must be good for the heart and kidneys. So whenever he had enough money in his pocket, he’d go buy a turtle to cook.
“Spare me, please! Be a nice guy and don’t murder me!” That’s what someone dressed in black said to him in a dream. He knelt in front of Zheng Laozhi and pleaded for his life. The funny thing was that after he woke up, Zheng found that his wife had had the same dream.
That morning, a fisherman came to sell a big, fat fresh water turtle he had caught. Zheng Laozhi was delighted. He drooled as he paid the fisherman for the turtle, even though the price was high. “Cook it!” he gleefully sang out.
“Just a minute,” his wife said, “Have you forgotten our dream last night?” “Aww, that was just a dream. You can’t believe everything that pops up in a dream.”
“ But I don’t think that a man dressed in black could be bringing any good news. Look, husband, why don’t you just let this turtle go?”
“What? You want me to let a turtle go when it’s only a step away from the kitchen? You woman sure have some weird ideas.”
With that, Zheng walked into the kitchen and cooked that turtle. Then he ate it and enjoyed every bite. But for some reason, after he finished, he decided to take a bath.
His wife waited and waited outside the bathroom, but her husband didn’t come out again. She listened carefully. She didn’t hear him washing. She knocked on the door, but he didn’t answer.
Finally, she went in to see what was going on. When she opened the door,she saw the bathtub was full of blood. Her husband had dissolved into the bath water like a turtle cooked into soup, and there was nothing left of him but his hair!
51.煮熟的烏龜
江蘇丹徒安康有個叫鄭老志的人，他最喜歡吃的菜是淡水龜。他這麼愛吃淡水龜有三個原因。一，肉剛剛好，既不太嫩又不太老。二，吃龜後他睡得很香。三，他相信吃龜對心和腎有好處。所以只要他口袋里有足夠的錢，他就買烏龜來煮吃。
「放了我吧，求求你！行行好，不要殺我！」他夢到有一個穿黑衣服的人對他說。他跪在鄭老志的面前，求他饒他一命。最奇怪的是 ，鄭老志醒後，發現他的妻子也做了一模一樣的夢。
第二天早上，一個漁夫要賣給鄭一只他捕到的又大又肥的淡水龜。鄭老志非常高興。儘管價格不菲，他還是買了。他一邊付錢一邊流口水。「煮了它！」他高興的哼著小調。
「等等，」他妻子說，「你忘了昨天夜里的夢了？」「哎呀，只是一個夢而已。夢怎麼能當真呢。」
「但是我不認為一個穿著黑衣服的人會帶來喜訊。好了，你為什麼不放了這只烏龜呢？」
「什麼？都要到廚房了，你還要我放了這只烏龜？你們女人總是疑神疑鬼。」
說完，鄭就走到廚房里煮那只龜。然後細細品味。不知道為什麼，他吃完後想要洗個澡。
他妻子在浴室外等了很久，但是她丈夫再也沒有出來。她仔細一聽，沒聽見他洗澡的聲音。她上去敲門，但是他沒有應聲。
最後，她進去看看這是怎麼了。當她開門後，看到澡盆里都是血。她丈夫就像那只被煮成湯的龜一樣，在洗澡水里融解了，除了頭髮，什麼都不剩！