入世第三課 The Third Lesson Of Entering The Secular World

入世第三課

THE THIRD LESSON OF ENTERING THE SECULAR WORLD

楊釗

Author Charles Yeung Translated by Soula Lo

青年人走入社會， 希望能夠自立， 要自立， 首先要解決衣、食、住、行問題，若衣、食、住、行都解決不了， 而去謀求其他問題，可以說是顛倒次序，次序顛倒就容易產生混亂；混亂則令身心不安，身心不安就容易令身體及其他方面出問題。所以，歷史的案例告訴我們，人生必須按部就班，才能健康地成長。人生成長的次序，首先要立志學習，其次是能夠自立，建立小康家庭，再其次是富裕起來。其中的道路應如何走，應該學習些什麼？實在不是一件簡單的事，在這里姑且介紹一下其中的要點，社會上千樣萬種知識和本領，其中最基本最重要的兩種：其一為做事，其二為做人。因此人生之道首先是「處事待人」之道，至于如何處理事情，把事情辦好，重要一環是學會與人溝通，與人相處，只要學會與人相處，學會與人溝通，對把事情做好，有很大的幫助。而與人相處的首要條件是學會「吃虧」，學會退一步思考問題，此正所謂「退一步海闊天空」，有許多路可以走。所以古人提醒我們，與人相處的方法是：「讓他三尺也無妨」，正是「千里修書為一牆，讓他三尺也無妨，萬里長城今猶在，不見當年秦始皇」，內容是古代有一人家去信告知在朝廷做大官的親戚說：鄰居把與自己房子相連的公共路的地，拿去建了房子，令路窄了。在朝廷做大官的親戚就回信告訴他們，他要占，便讓他占好了，甚至「再讓三尺又何妨呢？」，結果其在鄉村的親屬真的把屋的圍牆退後三尺，讓兩屋之間的路寬一點，而對方見到鄰居不僅不爭，反而讓步；因此，他也退後三尺，令兩屋之間成為一條寬闊的大路，一時成為佳話，轟動全城，至今可說亦有千年歷史。

Young people entering society would hope to be independent. To be independent, first they need to solve their issues involved with clothing, food, residence, and transportation. If they cannot solve the issues of clothing, food, residence, and transportation, but plan to deal with other matters first, that would be in reverse order. Reversing the order tends to cause chaos easily and chaos would cause unsettlement in body and mind. When body and mind are unsettled, it could be easy to cause health problems and other issues. So, as some cases from history have told us, life』s progress must go in a perfect order; it should progress step by step, in order to grow up healthily.

For the sequence of life』s progress, young people first need to be resolute on learning; second, make their life independent, which includes building a family of comfortable means, and then gradually become wealthy. How to walk through these paths, and what subjects should they learn? These are not an easy task to achieve. Here are a few key points I would like to introduce to them. There is thousands of knowledge and skills in the world, but the most basic and most important subjects are these two: One is to handle tasks; another is to get along with others.

Therefore, the way of life, first, it has to be the way of 「handling tasks and getting along with others」. As for how to deal with tasks and get things done, the most important step is to learn to communicate with people and to get along with people. So long as we can get along with people and communicate with them, it can help us to get things done. As for the primary term of getting along with people, it is learning 「to accept the unfavorable situation instead of taking advantages from other people」. Learn to take a step back to think of the issues. As the old saying said, 「Take a step back, the picture would be broader and boundless」, there are many paths available. So the ancients remind us, the best way to get along with people is, 「Why not let him take three feet more?」 which is from the old poem, 「A letter travels a thousand miles for a fence only, why not let him take three feet more? Look at how The Great Wall still exists now, yet we do not see the first Emperor of the Qin.」 This poem comes from an ancient story: Once upon a time, there was a family that sent a letter to tell their relative who had a high position in the court. The man wrote in his letter, 「Our neighbor took the adjacent public land and built their house on it, which made the path between two houses even narrower.」 The relative who was a high official in the court replied, 「If he wants to take the land, just let him take it. Why not let him take three feet more?」 Then the man of this family in the countryside took the high official』s advice and actually moved their fence three feet back in, which made the path between two houses a bit wider. The neighbor who took the public land saw that family not only didn』t confront him with this matter, but even made a concession. Hence, he moved their fence three feet back in as well.

After that, the path between the two houses became a big road, which made a great story on everybody』s lips at the time and caused a great sensation in the big towns; it has about a thousand year』s history by now.

在「處事和做人」的學問之中，儒家認為其中二課是必修科，其一是『大學』，其二是『中庸』， 在這里與大家再一次溫習『中庸』是如何教導「做人之道」的：

In the learning of 「handle tasks and get along with people」, the Confucianists think these two lessons are required courses: one is The Great Learning; another is The Doctrine of the Mean (two of the books from the Four Books of Confucian philosophy). Let』s review how The Doctrine of the Mean teach us about 「the way of being a good man」:

孔子說：「我憎惡那些表面看似是好，而實在是不好的人；就好像稻田中的莠草，它攪亂了稻苗；我憎惡那些花言巧語的人，恐怕他們攪亂了道義；我憎惡那些口甜舌滑的人，恐怕他們攪亂了誠信；我憎惡那些鄰國的淫聲，恐怕他攪亂了雅樂；我憎惡那些黑混紅的紫色，恐怕它攪亂了朱紅的正色。」

Confucius said, 「I loathe those who appear to be good people, but deep down they are actually very bad ones; it』s just like the weeds in the rice field, they would only disturb the rice seedlings. I loathe those who are full of delicate flatteries, I am afraid they would disturb morality and justice. I loathe those who are full of sweet talks and smooth tongues, I am afraid they would disturb honesty and trust. I loathe those lascivious noises in the neighboring countries, I am afraid they would disturb the righteous ceremonial music and classical music. I loathe the purple color that is mixed by black and red, I am afraid it will confuse others with the true color of red.」

孔子說：「君子所作所為，都是依照中庸提倡的道理和方法；小人所作所為，都是違背中庸的道理。君子實踐中庸的道理，也就是時時刻刻謹守無過、不及的原則；小人做事則違背中庸的道理，因此就會沒有顧忌而膽大妄為。」

Confucius said, 「Gentlemen』s behavior would always follow the principle and manners that advocates in The Doctrine of the Mean, and petty men』s behavior always against the principle of The Doctrine of the Mean. Gentlemen would put the principle of The Doctrine of the Mean into practice, which means they would always obey the principle of neither more or less. However, the petty men』s way of dealing with tasks is always against the principle of The Doctrine of the Mean. Therefore, they are unscrupulous and fear nothing.」

孔子說：「忠和恕是離開正道不遠的，不願意加在自己身上的東西，切勿加在別人的身上。」

Confucius said, 「Loyalty and forgiveness are never far from the righteous way. Do not do to others what you don』t want to be done to you.」

孔子說：「平常的行為注意道德操守，平時說話要小心謹慎。品德、學問有不足的地方，不敢不勉力去追求和改進。」

Confucius said, 「Watch out our daily behavior, to see if it meets morality and integrity. Be extra cautious with our daily speech. If there』s something insufficient in our virtue and learning, we should do our best to pursue and improve without hesitation.」

孔子說：「射箭有些像君子的作風，射不中箭靶的中心，就要檢討及反省自己的不足，而不是埋怨外間風力及陽光影響自己的成績。」

Confucius said, 「Archery is somewhat like gentlemen』s attitude, if their arrows cannot reach to the target center, they would examine and introspect their inadequacy, but not blaming the wind and the sunlight for affecting the results.」

孔子說：「君子推行大道，例如仁義、忠孝之道，就好像走遠路一樣，必定從近處開始；又譬如登山，必定從低處開始。」

Confucius said, 「Gentlemen would carry out the great way, such as the way of Humaneness, Righteousness, Loyalty and Filial piety. It』s like walking a long road one must start from the nearest point; it is also like climbing a mountain one must start from a low point.」

孔子說：「以上的道理，有些人生下來就知道了，稱為『生而知之』，有些人要經過學習才知道，稱為『學而知之』；有些人則要在困苦之中或者在挫折之中才能領悟到其中的道理，稱為『困而知之』。雖然，領悟道理的入門和方法不一樣，但所明白的道理是相同的。」

Confucius said, 「The reasons mentioned above, some people know it innately, it』s called, 『innate knowledge』; some people need to learn it, it』s called, 『learned knowledge』; some people need to comprehend it through experiencing sufferings or frustrations, it』s called, 『experienced knowledge』. Though the gateway and methods may be different, the reasons they understand are the same.」

孔子說：「任何事情，必須預先有準備，才會成功；沒有準備，往往會失敗；上台致詞及演講之前有準備，又或者先練習幾遍，到時就不會「口窒」及不暢順；做事之前先有準備就不會困難重重，行動之前先思考完備，就不會因失敗而後悔自責，上路之前先有準備就不會走上絕路。」

Confucius said, 「Everything needs to be prepared beforehand in order to be successful. Without preparation, things usually would fail. Have sufficient preparation before a speech, or practice several times beforehand, then the speakers would not be tongue tight and rough. Have sufficient preparation before doing something, then the tasks wouldn』t be full of difficulties. Have sufficient consideration before action, then we would not regret and blame ourselves for failing. Have sufficient preparation before we set out upon our journey, we would not walk into a dead end.

君子依自己所處的位置和角色而行事，不貪慕本位以外的企求；處于富貴，行為就會合乎富貴的身份，做富貴人士本份應該做的事情，處于貧窮，行為就會做合乎貧窮身份的事情。

「Gentlemen would act in accordance with their positions and roles; they would not dream and desire something beyond his standard. When they are in a wealthy and high position, their behavior would meet with their status; they would do whatever the wealthy and respectable people should do. When they are poor, they would do everything that meet with their poor status.」

孔子說：「廣博地去學習，例如道德、學問、知識、技能等；細心思考，確切地實踐；沒有學到絕不罷休，尚未清楚，一定尋根問底，問過明白；認真地去思考，不掌握其中的原理和規律，絕不罷休；沒有在實踐中去練習和運用，一定要去實踐，實行不徹底絕不罷休。別人用一分力氣可以完成，我用一百分的氣力去做；別人用十分氣力可以完成，我用千分的氣力去做。如果能夠實踐這個原則，即使是愚笨的人，也會變得聰明，即使是懦弱的人，也會變得剛強。」

Confucius said, 「One should learn all kinds of knowledge extensively, such as: morals, cultures, knowledge, skills…etc.; One should think carefully, and execute it precisely; one will not rest until he learns the knowledge he wants. One will seek to the end and get to the bottom when he does not fully comprehend. He would take serious thoughts, and will not rest before he masters all the principles and rules. If he does not practice and use it, he will put it into practice, and he will not rest before he achieves the goal. If others can complete something with one percent of effort, he will put one hundred percent effort to achieve it. If others can complete something with ten percent of effort, he will put a hundred times more effort than others. If we can truly live up to this principle, even a stupid person can be smart, and even a weak person can be strong.」

「詩經‧衛風‧碩人篇」說：「穿了彩色的錦衣，外面加上一件罩衫。」這是因為厭惡那件錦衣的豔麗。所以，「君子之道」表面是黯淡的，(現代語稱為「低調」)，但會一天一天地彰明起來；「小人之道」， 表面是風光的， ( 現代語稱為「好高騖遠」)，卻會一天一天地衰敗。

In The Book of Songs, Odes of Wei, the Chapter of The Great Man said, 「Wear a big overall to cover the colorful and pricy shirt.」 That is because he despises the bright color of that expensive shirt. Therefore, a gentleman』s way is to dim the surface (the modern term is to keep a low profile), but his brightness will manifest eventually; On the other hand, a petty man』s way is to stay shiny on the surface (the modern term would be craving something high and out of reach), but his glossy surface will dim eventually.